I shall dwarf the brilliance of every other blog ever written in the history of the Universe with my witty, perceptive, socially relevant observational banter! I'll only admit being a tool for pop culture if it makes me seem retro (my favorite Golden Girl is Rose!) and/or cool (my favorite type of music is obscure 1960's garage psyche!) I'll only post pictures of myself that are high-contrast and so flattering that you can barely tell it's a person!
Maybe I give up.